read his blog... well wat to say... happy for him? he found someone who he like le... i should feel happy for him right... but why am i crying inside...

suddenly realise that i am really a big stupid idiot... i didnt really treasure anyone that enter my life... i seem to take them for granted... i truly love those who i have been together with... but well but i dunno how to be with themm dunno how to treasure them and dunno how to feel wat they feel... perhaps i am just so cold blooded? or i am just an idiot... cant seems to find anymore words to fit myself in.... please... stop telling me how nice i am... i am not at all... u all dunno me... i not nice at all... i am mean, petty,cold blooded, idiot,silly,stupid,childish,lier,f*ucker, flirt and many many more... i act i love to act... i am a good actress.... no one see thru me right... that me... so just stay away from me... all of you just stay away... i dun wan to hurt myself, neither do i wan to hurt anyone else, maybe no one is hurt at all....only i am the ones hurting myself... i somehow feel i am always a sub somehow... that what i feel... i dunno... maybe i am wrong or maybe i am right... that only another party know...

pls ... come near me only when u truly wants to be my friend... dun just take me as a sub ... i dun wan to be any sub of anyone to fill any of u emptiness... i dun wan ... i am me myself... just treat me as me myself... no anyone else...

i start to grow myself a protective shield...i dun really wan anyone to come into the shield... if u ever enter... i will try to bite a u all... i mean it.... i dun mind being friend with you people... but pls dun enter my shield and hurt me... i mean it means i mean it...

and guys... please dun be so despo or wat... i cant find any word to fit in... my vocab are limited... sorry if i am mean in my words...but i cant help it....
so please...
dun ever say u love me when u dun love me,
dun ever say u love me when u just need someone to love u
dun ever say u love me when u just wan to find a sub of someone else
dun ever say u love me when u just wan find someone to fill your emptiness
dun ever say u love me when u just want love dun mind anything else
dun ever say u love me when u u are loving another one
dun ever say u love me when u are still thinking of someone else
dun ever say u love me when u intent to bluff me from the start
dun ever say u love me when u dont at all....
and dun ever talk abt feeling when there isnt any

i dun ask for much.... just someone who truly loves me... but that seems hard...
nvm... i already prepare for the worst... the most i go be nun?? hahax...

i will cont my acting?? i am cheerful i am happy and i not sad at all... i am going to hallucinate all of you all... so that i can cont my acting... hahax... rem i am not sad at all... so pls dun give me those weird weird look or ask me anything... i lost my memory already... =)

and pls dun anyhow guess whoever he is i am mentioning... haha... u all won get the correct ans de... even u got it u also wont know... so please stop guessing.... u all might be wrong...

well.... i shall stop my somehow... abit sad sad de entries?? haha... watever sad or happyx... whos care~~~ whahaaaaa ~~

conclusion... i am mad... stay away from me!!!!!!!!!!