how should i feel now?
sad?
hurt?
angry?
happy?
i dunno.... i am quite numb already...
i once dreamt of myself appear in a fairy tales story... there i live in a big beautiful castle with no worry no war... just full for love care peace....there i met my prince... the only one for me... he was always by my side... no matter rain or shine... whenever i need him... he would always appear...
i always holdto this hope... hoping one day i really will meet one.... but now i realise it is just a dream... a fairy tale....it will not happen in the real life... no.... no one will be able to stay by another side for a life time...no... not every one will have a happy ending right....

i am desperatly in need of someone to talk to... i realise there is no one i can turn to... notfamily members... they are all so busy with their own stuff...not friend either... there is no one i can talk to....no one... they are all so so busy.... so busy.... the only soul that i can find is myself.... i can only talk to myself.........

i lost the attention i wanted for a very long time... i try to find it back... i try all my mights... i cry i act funny, i do all sort of thing... wat did i get in return? a few sec of attention only... and back to normal again.... i am always alone... i need some one to give me attention... someone to care too... but i jusst cant find it... in return.. is just that i am being unreasonable or wat de...
dunno from when start... i start to like to shop alone... i like the feeling of being alone... but i still hoping for the attention i wan... i try all my might to fight for the attention i wan.... but i lost the war ... completely.... i give up.... i give up everything le.... i am numb already... i am tired already... i dun ever wan attention anymore... wat for... is just a stupid damn hell thing... i can live without it... i am hurt enough from my previous trying... i dun wan to try anymore....

im ok with it... i dun need anyone to pity about me ... i dun need any attention....i try to get it before... but what i get in the end is just me being hurt...

i dun need promises too... all those promises i get is just all lies... i pin so much hope in those promises... and in the end i get nothing to... i am just being naive...

i got nothing much to say anymore... whatever i say make no difference anymore... even isay i really dun mind u being busy... got wat use... over is over le....


Never say I love you
If you don't really care
Never talk of feelings
If they aren't really there
Never hold my hand
If you mean to break my heart
Never say forever
If you ever plan to part
Never look into my eyes
If you are telling me a lie
Never say hello
If you think you'll say goodbye
Never say that I'm THE one
If you dream of more than me
Never lock up my heart
If you don't have the key ....